{"id":4625,"date":"2022-01-13T18:24:43","date_gmt":"2022-01-13T18:24:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/forlife.ro\/?p=4625"},"modified":"2022-01-13T21:43:46","modified_gmt":"2022-01-13T21:43:46","slug":"sa-spargem-cateva-tipare-vechi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/forlife.ro\/en\/sa-spargem-cateva-tipare-vechi\/","title":{"rendered":"S\u0103 spargem c\u00e2teva tipare vechi"},"content":{"rendered":"
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S\u0103 spargem c\u00e2teva tipare vechi<\/h3>\t\t\t
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Lumea a trecut de la \u201dCopilul trebuie s\u0103-\u0219i \u0219tie locul\u201d, la incapacitatea de a avea \u00een cas\u0103 minimul de comunicare civilizat\u0103.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Educa\u021bia cu ajutorul c\u0103reia ob\u021bii rezultate nu are nevoie de control, for\u021bare, coerci\u021bie sau pedeaps\u0103.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Pai \u0219i atunci, te \u00eentrebi, ce pui \u00een loc?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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O rela\u021bie adev\u0103rat\u0103, respect, autonomie \u0219i dragostea necondi\u021bionat\u0103.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Dorin\u021ba de a de\u021bine controlul sau, dimpotriv\u0103, ne mai av\u00e2nd nici un control, trec\u00e2nd peste ceea ce are nevoie adolescentul t\u0103u cu adev\u0103rat,<\/div>\n
nu te va ajuta s\u0103 cre\u0219ti un copil capabil, \u00eencrez\u0103tor, empatic, rezilient, cu posibilitate de a rezolva probleme \u0219i de a-i respecta pe cei din jur.<\/div>\n
\u00cent\u00e2lnesc foarte mul\u021bi p\u0103rin\u021bi care nu \u0219tiu cum \u0219i c\u00e2nd s\u0103 spun\u0103 Nu.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Mul\u021bi dintre dumneavoastr\u0103 crede\u021bi c\u0103 dragoste necondi\u021bionat\u0103 nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103 spui Nu.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Mul\u021bi dintre dumneavoastr\u0103 crede\u021bi c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 v\u0103 asculta\u021bi adolescentul, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 fie nevoie ca el s-asculte (doar p\u0103rerea lui conteaz\u0103).<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Mul\u021bi dintre dumneavoastr\u0103 crede\u021bi c\u0103, toler\u00e2nd moduri inadecvate de comportament, \u00eenseamn\u0103 a \u021bine cont cu adev\u0103rat de ceea ce are nevoie adolescentul.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Dac\u0103 r\u0103spunde\u021bi f\u0103r\u0103 discernere la cereri \u0219i preten\u021bii, crede\u021bi uneori c\u0103 e un modul de a v\u0103 \u00eengriji de nevoile sale.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Copiii dumneavoastr\u0103 au drepturi nenum\u0103rate, alegeri, f\u0103r\u0103 nici o responsabilitate.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Le proteja\u021bi libertatea \u0219i a\u0219a-zisa autonomie, \u00een condi\u021biile \u00een care doar \u00eendeplini\u021bi dorin\u021be ap\u0103rute peste noapte.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\u00ceNS\u0102, tocmai pentru c\u0103 II IUBI\u021aI \u0219i II PRE\u021aUI\u021aI, \u00eenv\u0103\u021ba\u021bi-l s\u0103 vin\u0103 la “masa cooper\u0103rii”!!<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Cooperarea nu o realiza\u021bi cu teama de confruntare, cu teama de ceea ce s-ar putea dezl\u0103n\u021bui.<\/div>\n
Confruntarea nu \u00eencepe satisf\u0103c\u00e2nd necondi\u021bionat dorin\u021be, ci cu decizia de a lua totul de la cap\u0103t, cu RESPECT RECIPROC.<\/div>\n
F\u0103r\u0103 impunerea \u0219i respectarea acestei decizii, doar \u00eencuraja\u021bi perpetuarea unui model defectuos de rela\u021bionare, care nu \u00eei este de folos adolescentului, nici acum, nici \u00een viitor.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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A\u0219a cum v-a\u021bi dat deja seama, iubesc \u0219i pledez pentru \u00eemputernicirea copiilor no\u0219tri, pentru \u00eemplinirea nevoilor lor emo\u021bionale.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\u00cens\u0103 lipsa de gestionare a comportamentelor nedorite nu \u00eempline\u0219te nici pe departe vreo nevoie a copilului dumneavoastr\u0103, ci dimpotriv\u0103.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Dac\u0103 modul disfunc\u021bional de rela\u021bionare dureaz\u0103 de ceva timp, fi\u021bi preg\u0103ti\u021bi de lupte, dramatism \u0219i crize.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Cum am castigat eu luptele de putere? Ne-lupt\u00e2nd.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Cu CALM, mi-am exprimat dorin\u021ba de schimbare.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\u0218i a\u0219teptam ca al meu copil s\u0103 se lini\u0219teasc\u0103.<\/div>\n
\u00centre timp, nu am mai dat curs nici unei preten\u021bii (doar urgen\u021be \u0219i lucruri de strict\u0103 necesitate), dec\u00e2t \u00een momentul \u00een care am putut sta normal vorb\u0103.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Am stat \u0219i am a\u0219teptat c\u00e2t era nevoie.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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C\u00e2t s\u0103 realizeze copilul meu c\u0103 vorbesc serios.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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C\u0103 nu m\u0103 r\u0103zg\u00e2ndesc \u0219i ca voi fi consecvent\u0103 de acum \u00eencolo.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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C\u0103 am cea mai buna inten\u021bie s\u0103 \u00eei satisfac nevoile cele mai importante ( nu pu\u021bine). F\u0103r\u0103 ca el sa treac\u0103 peste “nu pot’,” nu acum’ \u0219i “te rog, ascult\u0103”.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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A\u0219a a \u00eenceput \u0219i drumul nostru de la lupte, preten\u021bii, dram\u0103, repro\u0219uri la mult-r\u00e2vnita rela\u021bie de cooperare.<\/div>\n
Tu, ai curaj s\u0103 spui “punct \u0219i de la cap\u0103t”?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Lumea a trecut de la \u201dCopilul trebuie s\u0103-\u0219i \u0219tie locul\u201d, la incapacitatea de a avea \u00een cas\u0103 minimul de comunicare … <\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4626,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4625","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-provocarile-adolescentei"],"yoast_head":"\nS\u0103 spargem c\u00e2teva tipare vechi - For Life - \u00cempreun\u0103 d\u0103m via\u021b\u0103 \u00eenv\u0103\u021b\u0103rii<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/forlife.ro\/en\/sa-spargem-cateva-tipare-vechi\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta 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